The end of Super Mario 3D Allstars

 Oh no. Our precious Super Mario 3D Allstars, gone forever. AaaaaaaagH.

I've gone over a few 'end of life' moments for games over my time on this blog, documenting the passing of some titles or services that were taken too soon. (Or not soon enough) Recently there was Anthem, and Artifact was tossed in there somewhere too, but a while ago it was Elder Scrolls Legends (Serious RIP on that one) and sooner or later it'll be Google Stadia. But if there's one thing all of those games/services have/had that Super Mario Allstars does not, it's circumstances leading up to their dismissal that were insurmountable to some degree. Whether that was because no one wanted to play this particular game or the publishers didn't want to support it anymore; somewhere along the way it made sense for the plug to get pulled on these games before things got embarrassing. (And in some instances, they got embarrassing anyway.) But today we have a game being lined up for the chopping block for literally no earthly reason whatsoever, or at least, not one which would justify such a drastic step. So be prepared to unravel this mystery as we look into what on earth is happening around Super Mario Allstars.

Firstly, obviously, this isn't a surprise by any stretch of the imagination. Right away on the eve of announcement the Nintendo task masters voiced their highly nonsensical plan to the masses and we all questioned it, but ultimately let them go wild figuring all would become clear in the months to come. So you're going to offer these high-quality remasters of some of the best 3D Super Mario games ever made for but 3 months before withdrawing them for sale forever? Yeah right. That'd be utterly ridiculous and more than just a little stupid. Right? (Someone please tell me that I'm right here.) But surprise, it's been 3 months. Everything is still preceding as planned and everyone's still scratching their heads wondering why Nintendo are pulling this prank on... themselves? The last time a big title like this was pulled from a store it more cost the game publisher potential revenue, and let's see: who's the publisher of Mario games again... oh yeah! Nintendo! (Seriously, what gives?)

And it's not as though we're talking about products with low demand here. Super Mario 3D Allstars was a single cartridge that managed to squeeze onto it Super Mario 64, one of the most classically revered games ever made, Super Mario Sunshine, a beloved entry in the franchise with some genuine hardcore fans, and Super Mario Galaxy, a game that's said to be so good it eclipses the majority of the Nintendo Wii library. There's not a dud in this box, and they're all heavy hitters in their own that certainly could have been justified for their own rereleases at some point down the line if some internal team feels like doing a remake. (In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if such a initiative is being taken into account for this decision) To have the now definitive versions of each of these products on the Switch, is a money printing master stroke. This cartridge could have easily become a must-have that everyone has in their Switch collection. And if you managed to pick it up in that 3 month window, good for you, but that's not everyone by a long shot.

Just ignoring the plain fact that a limited release window when it's entirely unnecessary is undeniably asinine, how could Nintendo seriously justify putting the pressure on it's consumers to rush out to buy a kids game right slap in the middle of a pandemic? I mean sure, they had it up over Christmas, how very magnanimous of them, but these past 12 months have been fraught with economic hardships world wide, so you'll be forgiven for being a Nintendo fan who just couldn't find it in themselves to forgo rent in order to pick up Super Mario 3D Allstars before it was gone forever. You could say that's a bit of a low blow to put the weight of a global pandemic on Nintendo, but I'm merely pointing out the plethora of ways in which Nintendo, with this dumb game plan of theirs, is hurting themselves as well as the fans. But the question at the end of it all is- why?

For my part I have a theory which hasn't really shifted since this all first began. Nintendo have an absolute fetish for premium pricing everything that shoots out of their stores, from hardware to old games to releases and, of course, remasters. It's what they live for, they'd sooner sell their own mother's souls to Satan than slash the price on a two year old title. But I think recently they've started to receive some furrowed brows over this stinginess in the current climate and this was some sort of attempt of theirs to try something new. If they limit the time this new remaster pack is up then no one can complain about the price sticking to the ceiling for it's entire lifespan because the game will have never been on the shelves long enough to justify price-cuts. Additionally, the forced scarcity will drive up early sells from people who don't want to miss out. Yeah, that should work fine barring a surprise global pandemic or something. But I think their's is a plan that's only going to backlash for two obvious reasons.

Scalpers, for example. My god, did they not think about the scalpers? How could they not, Nintendo have been singlehandedly feeding that entire industry since the amiibo days. People who swoop in to snatch up as much of a limited stock as they feasibly can only to sell it on at a marked up price. Scalpers have been the bane of the console market for the past few months now, and you can bet they were ontop of the 3D Allstars situation before it even released. People were selling their pre-orders for this game, that's a problem when we're talking about manufactured scarcity. Time and time again Nintendo has played into the hands of scalpers instead of just keeping the consumer fed and I just don't understand it. Is someone high-up in Nintendo deeply invested in the wellbeing of certain scalping groups or something, this doesn't need to be as hard as it always is with them.

And then there's emulation, because: of course. Whenever the conversation is raised about the legality of emulation, Nintendo come close to mind for the plain fact that they will legally swipe down any emulators they can get their hands on. This is both because they themselves are ever looking to rip people off for decades old software they want to pawn off for premium prices, and because Nintendo games are some of the post pirated out there. (Probably due, in no small part, to the aforementioned artificial scarcity) Reminding everyone about these classics only to dangle it in front of their face is going to win over some, for sure, but it'll also drive others to play those legendary titles in the only other method available to them, which also happens to be a method which Nintendo aren't seeing any revenue from. (Although, admittedly, I'm not sure if Super Mario Galaxy is playable in most available emulators. The Wii emulator was a little rough last time I saw it.)

But what we have to think and say on the matter, as fans who care about the games, is meaningless to Nintendo. They'll dance to the beat of their drums same as they always have, even when everyone's trying to tell them that the drum set is on fire. Sheer quality of their products, the effort of the development staff, is enough to stop me short of ever despising Nintendo, but the repeated knowingly stupid, draconian and/or greedy machinations of their upper management really does try at times. Imagine how much of a positive force Nintendo could be if they tried to live up to their image, even just a little bit. They could be paragons to shape the face of the entire industry; with their size, history and influence their example could mean everything. But they're not, they won't be, and until the entire current Japanese board of Nintendo retires (Don't hold your breath) we're going to be having these head scratching moments of "Why not just do the right thing" for years to come.

Super Mario 3D Allstars

Another win for the scalpers

How many years has it been since Super Mario Allstars? 27 years! Can you believe that? Almost 30 years since we got that blinding collection of Super Mario remakes that bought colour to the early years of the mushroom kingdom! Getting the chance to play through all those classic Mario days with the presentation of Super Mario World to back it up (albeit, not with that title's arguably superior gameplay) was quite the revelation that any Nintendo fan would be remiss not to try out. (And in fact, Nintendo Switch owners can right now because Nintendo just added it to their virtual console line-up. Way to play to the crowd.) But it would take something of similar gravitas and value to justify Nintendo invoking that holy Allstars name once again, but what could possibly be the next step forward? The next evolution? What would become of the Allstars name if we stuck the Red Stone of Aja upon it's brow? Well you read the title, didn't you? It's Super Mario 3D Allstars.

I'm frankly shocked and a little appalled that this hasn't ever happened sooner, why has it taken up until now for Nintendo to put their full weight behind remakes of their beloved 3D offerings. These are games often touted as some of finest examples of 3D platforming ever constructed by human hands, so in the tail age of this 'age of remakes', why haven't we already received at least one of these titles?  Well I guess there's no need to split hairs over wasted past, because today we have an impending re-release of some of the greatest Mario games of all time to look forward to. I'm talking Super Mario 64, Super Mario Galaxy and Super Mario Sunshine, all together at last in one glorious package. All for the price of one full price triple A game. (Geez Nintendo, you sure know how to put a price on nostalgia!)

Yes, in the vein of remakes this does come with some improvements upon the base game, although nothing as drastic as a full recolouring like we saw from the base Allstars. Instead it's all just graphical upgrades with an additional soundtrack mode thrown in there for those mega fans who just cannot live without the music of their childhood. Now I'm not saying that Nintendo absolutely had to do some drastic here like throw in brand new bunch of stages or a a second Luigi mode for 64, but I guess there's nothing inherently wrong with a simple resolution update. The big news here is the availability of these games that Nintendo have made a habit of artificially stifling in order to drum up the value of the games in question. It's actually rather ugly when you think about it, to hold such a ransom on important pieces of gaming history. One can only wonder the battle that had to be won within the corporate boards to get this pack approved as one collection and not three separate full-priced HD remakes.


Of course, when the announcement hit the Nintendo lovers of the Internet went absolutely wild. These are the kind of folk, remember, who invented the 'Old is always best' model of fandom so they couldn't have been catered to in a more absolute way if Nintendo tried. I'm not even really a part of any of those groups and I've still been flooded with videos of excited fans recording themselves practically giving birth to this announcement. And good for them, it's nice to have something to be excited about in this crappy year and if Nintendo don't have any other big Mario game coming out in the near future than this makes absolute sense for them to put out. It's a wonder, in fact, that something inexplicably moronic and despicable hasn't been instituted in order to wholly sour this whole event. I mean, that would be on-brand for this year, right?

Oh wait, that's exactly what happened because Nintendo can't help themselves. (I swear, these people are the worst sometimes.) So what did they do? Well, do you remember all the way back in the days of Amiibo figurines when Nintendo thought it was smart to artificially strangle the market to create false scarcity and drum up perceived value, only to play it competely dumb when this gave rise to an age of scalpers? (Who could have ever guessed that 2+2 makes 4?) Well they've done that again by announcing that this impending collection pack, which is obviously destined to be in high demand, will only be available for 6 months. (That includes the digital versions.) And as you can imagine the scalpers are already up and about selling off their preorders. That's right, Nintendo have managed to make an unreleased game a collector's item. (Good job, Arses)

This really does anger me, as someone who want's so desperately to buy into Nintendo's image as the 'friendly face of the games industry'. They imitate this Disney-esque persona of kindness and wholesomeness and use it as a mask to obfuscate from all the draconian and anti-consumer practises that they propagate. What possible benefit does it give the Nintendo team to limit the copies of a game which just about every devout Nintendo fan on the globe is going to want? It'll light a fire under folks for some early sales, maybe shore up this annual's earnings a bit, but in the long run it's invented a brand new bottleneck that will result in overpriced scalping jobs for literal years to come. Good job, Nintendo, you're literally promoting some of the grossest practises in the independent market yet again. (Why not just produce to meet demand? Is that a crazy thing to ask for?)

Already markets are getting flooded with 200$ prices for preorders and things will only get worse in the months to come. It won't be long until the game comes out and then Nintendo Switches with it installed will start hitting Ebay; these guys probably won't even wait for the game to come off the storefront next March. If you can't tell, I have no love for scalpers and their culture, all I want is to play good games and whenever I see a company intentionally get in the way of that goal I can't help but scratch my head and wonder why. No, literally why? Is it for bragging rights? So they can boast to their investors about creating another false-scarcity crisis? Please, someone explain why it is that Nintendo can't just be a normal game company who bring out games. I need to know!

At the end of the day, this probably means that folk like me won't get the chance to pick up this game when it's available, as I never buy at full price and you can bet this title will never see a sale. It's a shame that these are the sorts of practises that Nintendo stand, and have always stood, for. I'm lucky enough not to be too big of a Mario fan that I'd fall for this, but imagine if the same thing happened for Zelda, I'd be a goner! I'd like it, one day, if someone at Nintendo could wake up and realise the many ways in which they've been a toxic force in a industry they should be champions in. Heck, maybe they do know and they just don't care. (That's a sobering thought.) Hey, who knows. Maybe this whole dumb decision will be reversed and the digital download will lose it's cut-date. (But I seriously doubt it.)