Game Awards 2021 Time!!!

 You wa Shock!

So I've just finished watching the first episode of Stone Ocean, and right now it's important for me to get to my other duties for today which right now include... the game awards? Is it December already? Damn, this thing sneaks up on us out of nowhere, and with Geoff Keighley deciding to tee the audience up for inevitable disappointment with a talk of a reveal 'two years in the making', (First off, not your reveal to make Geoff, so that's kinda rude) it's about time I get to my favourite part of all of this nonsense- making a bunch of uneducated guess on an event for games I know little about in return for bragging rights. It all comes back to the bragging rights, baby! I haven't even been able to play most of this year's games thanks to the Scalper shut down of the supply lines atop of Covid atop of the stupidity happing specifically in my crappy country. (We're lucky if we can get sticks to feed our hearths down here, let alone a bloody PS5) But none of that is going to stop me being ignorant, so without further ado, here come the predictions. 

Deciding to give it all away in the very first moment, the first game that the Game Awards want people to vote on is the literally Game of the Year. Why would anyone stick around for other games after that? This years selection lacks an obvious winner too, with Metroid Dread, It Takes Two, Deathloop, Resident Evil: Village, Rachet & Clank: Rift Apart and Psychonauts 2 on the docket. What, Demons Souls doesn't count? (Was that in consideration last year? I can't remember) As expected, I haven't played a single one of these games so I can only base my suggestion off what I've seen others make of these games, and for each I have to say that interest seemed to droop off for a lot of these really rapidly. Deathloop was hardly popular for a month around my circles, It Takes Two had a bit more a presence, I didn't see anyone talk about Metroid Dread... Village and Rachet & Clank are two that have stood out this year, but Psychonauts has been the one winning universal praise from everyone I've seen. So I guess I'd pick Psychonauts 2, but it really seems like too niche of a game... I'm guessing that the award is going to go to RE8. (But if it goes to Psychonauts I'm going to literally kick myself)

Now comes best game direction, which is all about creative vision and innovation in game design. The list is actually exactly the same, except that Resident Evil 8 has been switched out for the AAA Roguelite Returnal, which I saw scoring quite a few fans from early on in this year. Rachet & Clank splashed huge waves with it's use of the next gen loading systems to instantly switch between world spaces, which is certainly making use of innovation and Pyschonauts is a total trip. It Takes Two certainly did bring co-op to the forefront once again, but I haven't heard enough of the specific techniques it uses to comment on that and Deathloop honestly falters on it's time-loop premise in exchange for something not nearly as strict and challenging as they led fans to believe with their trailers. I'm sure a lot would look on that as a good thing, but I see it as holding themselves back for what could have been a very interestingly balanced game that would have tugged on game design innovation. Another strong line-up, but I think for technological achievement (which I feel like is another category coming later, but I'll bite the bullet anyway) my money is on Rachet & Clank: Rift Apart.

Next is going to suck, because there is literally no way for this to brag my way through this one. Yeah, it's 'Best Narrative' time, and I haven't played a single one of these titles. There's no way you can pick up the feel for a narrative without experiencing it fully, and I'm sort of at a loss here. Pyschonauts, It Takes Two and Deathloop (really?) are here again, so I have a feeling we're going to a mulitaward winner this year again. (Psychonauts would be the kind of game to score it) Newcomers with this category are Life is Strange: True Colours and Guardians of the Galaxy, two games that I actually want to play and both for their stories. Again, I haven't a horse in this race whatsoever, but the power of ignorance demands I pick one. Straining myself for reviews I've heard for each title, I'd err towards something emotionally stirring (even though there's a specific category for that later) and though True Colours is literally about emotion, DONTNOD has never been able to stir anything in me aside from second hand embarrassment, so I'd lean towards Guardians. But hearing that to be an average game makes me just want to hedge my bets and pick Psychonauts 2, even having no idea what that game is even about... No, I can't be that ignorant- I pick Guardians of the- Life is- It takes- screw it, I'm flipping coins. Guardians, Heads, or Life, Tails. Guardians goes through against It Takes Two. And then It Takes Two wins. That's where my vote is at, people.

The next category seems a little mean on a few of the contestants, as it's 'best art direction', even though one of the entries is a clear art-house game. (Which, incidentally, I'd never even heard of until just now, funny.) You've got Deathloop, (Who did Arkane service in order to get nominated for every category?) Rachet et Clank, (Those furry physics are pretty sick) Psychonauts 2 (Truly trippy once it gets going) and Kena: Bridge of Spirits. (That's the Disney-tier animation game which looks like a literal movie in motion) But wait, didn't I say one of these games was a literal art-house project? That would be the last entry, The Artful Escape, which looks like an explosion of musical colour mad house creativity, it's basically a shoe in. But I've never heard of it. Kena still makes my animation loving heart soar, however, so despite the lacklustre narrative, I'm slapping the congratulatory hand on the square of their back. Kena is my vote.

Best Score and Music, huh. To think this is the earliest way that the Game Awards could find to stick Cyberpunk 2077 in the running is so sad. That was supposed to be the game to sweep this year completely, take every award, swing from the high halls in merriment. But reality is a stark bitch, ain't she? Guardians is here (I'm told the soundtrack is great and nostalgic, but 80's nostalgia feels egregiously overplayed right now), Nier Replicant is up for an award (but it's a remaster, so is that even fair? I don't think so. The music for Nier games might be incredible, but they've got to leave space for everyone else.) Also up is Deathloop (I hope Arkane invested in kneepads for the amount of time they had to spend on their knees in the planning stages of these awards) and then there's... wait, Artful Escape again? Literally it's two things were visuals and music. Alright then, screw it. Give the award to Artful Escape, it's determined to win something, and it probably deserves the Art award as well but the music one will be just as worthy. (I heard there's some Bowie influence in the game, so it might be worthy of the award, I don't know.)

Now it's Best Audio des- Deathloop again? Okay, at this point I'm starting to feel like this is a goddamn conspiracy; how the hell is Arkane up for this many awards!? Resident Evil: Village, Returnal and Rachet & Clank also return, but they seem like welcome friends in comparison to this drunk arse who won't leave the party. Personally, I can't really judge this category to any fair degree, nor do I know how newcomer, Forza Horizon 5, stacks up in these runnings. I would relent and just give it to Deathloop in pitty but- no, I'm getting stubborn now. This game better sweep every critic reward because it ain't getting no hand outs from me! I remember RE Engine Resident Evil Games being pretty stellar on sound design, so perhaps that carried over to RE8. In Dimitrescu I trust.

Oh thank god it's onto Best Performance so that now we can have- two entries for Deathloop. WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO TO ME ARKANE? HOW IS THERE NOT A LIMIT ON THE AMOUNT OF ENTIRES PER GAME? Okay, deep breaths, deep breaths. Both the male and female lead of Deathloop are up for awards. I'm sure their performances are great, I've not heard much of them. Alex Chen's voice actress, Erika Mori, is up for this category, and I've definitely heard a lot of buzz from people who like her character. Giancarlo Esposito is up, because apparently we're giving big time TV actors a shot at videogame awards now. I haven't played Far Cry 6, but if I know Ubisoft's formula, he probably shows up for a grand total of about 8 scenes and hardly has any character apart from 'Evil dictator man who sorta/kinda loves his son'. No dice. And then there's Maggie Robertson as- wait I know that face. And that name... Oh my god it's Lady Dimitrescu. I didn't even realise she would be up for an award when I wrote that last paragraph. Well her performance, hand in hand with the character design, pretty much shook the Internet early this year so is there even a competition here? For whatever reason (I couldn't possibly speculate out-loud in public where I might be judged) Lady D is the queen of this year's gaming line-up. She easily gets my vote, no doubt about it.

Games for Impact. Always hated this section. What games are the most 'award bait' for you to cry all over. It's not that I find the games themselves manipulative in that manner, more that I find the expectation this award implies as an advocate for manipulation. Life is Strange is the only returning entry for this category, with all the others being the kind of out-there games you'd expect. Boyfriend Dungeon is an isometric dungeon crawler/VN where you date your anthropomorphised weapons- wait what? (Why do I actually want to play that now?) Chicory is a colouring picture book turned into a game. (I'm sure there's more emotional depth to it, but the game description gives away none of that.) No Longer Home is another introspective dive into someone's life through the home they inhabit. (I get get odd Gone Home vibes from it, strangely.) And the last I've actually heard of, Before Your Eyes. It's a game where you jump through moments in your life based on how long you can keep your eyes open (it's supposed to be played with eye tracker software) because the moment you blink the scene changes. Powerful in premise alone, I would say. Which makes it my top pick easily.

Best Ongoing game is pretty self explanatory, even though with the state of the industry right now, it feels like any and every game could be done for this award. Heck, could Beyond Good and Evil make it for it's excessively 'ongoing' development time? There are no surprise entries here. Warzone is present despite it's rampant cheater problem, but I guess it did manage to almost totally cannibalise Vanguard's early sales so it ain't dead yet. Fortnite and Apex Legends trade regular news slots for their Battle Royal supremacy. Final Fantasy XIV has overtaken the disgraced WOW for biggest MMO in the world, but I don't think WOW has ever been eligible for this award anyway so there's no change there. All that's left is Genshin Impact which, aside from all the cringey hate that it gets from people who never played it, still manages to be fun for me. So I pick Genshin.

Now is best Indie game, a admirable award that goes to those small studios who set out to make the best they can fuelled with the power of their talents. This years line-up is freakin' fierce with 5 games that could each easily score the award. 12 Minutes is the time loop game staring James McAvoy and Willem Defoe, hard to believe it's indie with that cast, I know. Unfortunately, it doesn't do anything crazy with it's premise like it could, and that hurts it's potential. Then there's Death's Door, which is sort of like a Souls-Like with an adorable art style and puzzle sections. Kind of. I heard it's worth a play, but nothing world shattering. Kena is back, and I completely forgot that was an indie game. Incredible what some people can make out there. Loop Hero was a bit of craze back when it came out, with a simple premise that resonated so much with people. And then there's my pick, Inscryption, which matches Card games with horror in a stylised functional amalgam of wonderfulness. I love it so much. Inscryption all the way!

And now we start slipping into categories I know little to nothing about and don't care much for anyway, such as Best Mobile game. Genshin, League of Legends: Wild Rift, Marvel Future Revolution and Pokémon Unite. I actually played a lot of Pokémon Unite (although I was on Switch) and I have to admit that the MOBA married up to Pokémon so much better than it had any right to. But I can't just not pick Fantasian, which is also here, for it's diorama RPG goodness. (Even if it is a poxxy Apple exclusive. Who the hell plays games on MAC?) And Best Community Support is around too, with what I swear is the exact same lineup as last year. Genshin, Apex, Destiny 2, Final Fantasy XIV, Fortnite and No Man's Sky. I care for none of them honestly. But at a stretch, No Man's Sky did trick me into doing a full playthrough with it's Mass Effect update. Good for them,

Innovation in accessibility is sponsored by Chevrolet, apparently, and despite Far Cry, Horizon, Guardians of the Galaxy and Rachet with Clank all having accessibility options chucked in them- (Gaurdian's Streamer mode is a ghastly experience for certain scenes) 'The Vale: Shadow of the Crown' is literally an RPG following a blind girl where everything is relayed through audio cues. That's just really freakin' cool, there's no real other competition to something that badass. So I pick The Vale. AR/VR is a curious one, because I don't see a single AR game in the line-up. Didn't realise Lone Echo even got a sequel, Sniper Elite VR totally passed me by (but that sounds pretty dope, actually) Hitman 3 being VR is, similarly, something I didn't hear about, 'I expect you to die 2' is... okay and Resident Evil 4 VR is a lovely mess. So I pick... damn... I guess Resident Evil 4, because why not.

Best Action game is tucked away a ways in the selection here and- oh look at that, Deathloop has made it's ignoble return. At least this is a category for which it's well suited. Easily beating Far Cry 6 and it's 'let's make the same game again' song and dance. Returnal made big waves for it's apparently great gameplay loop and Chivalry II practically revived the fervour many thought lost for online medieval hack and slash. Back 4 Blood wasn't the swansong we all wanted it to be, but it was no total disaster either. Still, I guess I'm duty bound to offer Arkane a break and give them the award. This is the only one you guys are getting out of me, so you can stop hounding every damn list with your whimperous begging. (No, that isn't a word, but I like it. I'm making it a thing.)

Best action adventure is literally the same lineup for game of the year except that Deathloop is replaced with Guardians of the Galaxy, but that doesn't really make much of any sense at all because most seem to agree that Gaurdians gameplay is just as lacklustre as all the gameplay footage made it look. Does it really deserve to share room with all these real contenders? Metroid Dread has been annoying silent, which sucks because I'd love to throw it into consideration but I just don't have the experience to justify that. Psychonauts is a return platforming goodness with such gusto it makes you wonder why we every let that genre fall to the wayside in gaming at all. Rachet plus Clank is a mechanical marvel and Resident Evil 8 is more decent action than thrilling horror. I give it to Psychonauts, let Tim Schafer get his recognition. 

Best Role Playing game had the gall to bring make Cyberpunk 2077, a game which (I have no need to remind you) totally oversold on it's roleplaying premise so badly that most size it up next to a Ubisoft openworld title than a proper Role Playing game. Monster Hunter Rise is there as a solid translation of that series' formula to Switch, Scarlet Nexus is up (because apparently that game is an RPG. I didn't know anyone even played it) Shin Megami Tensi V has it's share of loving fans and Tales of Arise blew a fair few socks off. Where's 'Pathfinder: War of the Righteous'? I'm being serious, how did a superficial RPG like Cyberpunk make the cut but Pathfinder, a simply massive (if flawed) RPG marvel didn't? Colour me offended, truly, as I lay my vote down upon Persona's grittier cousin, Shin Megami Tensi.

Fighting games are a wash for me, I don't care for them. 'Nickelodeon All Star brawl' has no voice acting, waste of time. Virtu Fighter 5 exists, but not in my sphere of video game content apparently. I've never heard of Melty Blood in my life, and it doesn't look all that great either. Demon Slayer had a fighter with that same gross 2D to 3D anime style that games were doing 10 years ago. (Can we hire actual artists to reimagine these models next time, or do something like Dragon Ball FighterZ did, where every shot looks like a still from the anime?) I've always had a love for Guilty Gear's characters and gameplay, with special love on it's art style too, so that's where my vote is going this time. (I'm surprised Smash Bros isn't on the list again, I'm pretty sure this entry counts for legacy games too...)

Now we're getting onto the speedround of categories I think, because I'm loosing interest in these titles as they go along. Look at Best Family title, and it's two Mario entries! (Also, It Takes Two is a couples game, not a family game. There's an actual world of difference, Geoff Keighley) New Pokemon Snap is far too niche, Mario phoned it in for this year of games (one of them is literally just a rerelease) so I guess by process of elimination I've landed on the one proper Family game, Warioware: Get it Together. (Although that would make for a weird family experience with the amount of surrealist minigames that make up that game's bulk) Best Sim/strategy is another combination of categories that makes no sense to me. (there's no Sim games at all.) Evil Geniuses 2 hasn't been out long enough for me to play through it, Age of Empires IV has fans, Humankind doesn't hit the rafters it was shooting for but lands high regardless, Microsoft Flight Simulator shouldn't even be in this listing, it's time was last year, and Inscryption deserves another rewards. It's that good. 

Racing and Sports: No need to break it down. Screw FIFA, Forza Horizon 5 because those games are usually pretty good. Best multiplayer game, people like New Worlds, but I remember the insanity over Valheim (which had yet another update recently) and I love an underdog story so I pick that game. Content Creator of the year really doesn't belong in this event at all, but I've heard Dream's music video so I can't, in good conscience, pick him. (Also, he did cheat in speedrunning. Funny as all that was) I've heard of Fuslie though, and she's funny, so I pick her. (Asmongold helped to literally kill WOW, doesn't that public service deserve some recognition?) Best Debut Indie is just best indie with an extra step. The Forgotten City used to be a Skyrim Mod and I love that origin story, so that game gets my vote.

And now the furrowed brow deepens to bone level, because we have an award for Most Anticipated Game. We handing out awards to trailers now? One of these games could easily have a trailer at this event! Elden Ring is a big one here, fans have been literally playing it the past few weeks thanks to the open server test, so it's fresh in people's minds too. God of War Ragnarok is a big one, another contender, for whenever it's finally due. Horizon Forbidden West is the game that I'm loving the look of the most in the visual department, even though that fidelity is exclusive to hardware that might as well be mythical to a rube like me. Starfield is a nothing burger right now, we've gotten a single trailer that was so anemic I can't even remember what we saw in it. I don't even like the write up to this game, I just don't care. And then there's a game that still doesn't even have a title so has to be listed as 'The Sequel to The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild'. That game still is my pick though, because Breath of the Wild slapped.

Best Esports game, who cares, I don't- Valorant. Now it's best Esports athlete, the category I, and indeed I think all of us, have been waiting for. Which of these god-like individuals among the pantheon of Esports deserves the honour, nay the privilege, of being recognised as the best of the best. A titan among gods, the All-father (because despite this being 2021 Esports is still entirely male dominated). Chris' nickname 'Simp' is banned on Twitch, which is going to hurt his chances at godhood, I'm afraid. Heo 'showmaker' looks damn sure of himself with that crooked thumbs up. If my uber driver gave me that look before we set off, I'd be comfortable sleeping tin he back seat not expecting him to roll us over and explode. Magomed 'Collapse' wants me to buy his confidence, with that cross armed down-tilted look, but there's something about it- maybe the posture- which dissolves the whole persona for me. I just can't take him seriously, I don't fully understand it. Oleksander has long arms, and he wants us to know that. Can you see how many things he's holding in those arms? There's like- ten whole things there! I don't exactly know what those things are, but that's got to be impressive, maybe. And Tyson 'Tenz'... well, I don't know what to tell you, that guy scares me. He's got two fingers to his mouth in the shape of a gun, is that a threat? I'm worried about what this man will do to me if I don't pick him, there's not really that much of a choice left, then- I pick Tenz.

As for Esports team... why the hell is FaZe there? I'm pretty sure everyone knows about the very public crypto scam run by members of prime FaZe hardly a few months ago, they tried to use the guise of a charity to smuggle funds into themselves, that's barely a step above stealing from a hospital. DWG KIA, on the otherhand, is nigh on unpronounceable by me, and that draws me to them. (They play Lol, so eww, but the two guys in the picture still look cool.) As for best Esports Coach, I actually remember a few of these names from past years, which is why I didn't even need to analyse this for two long before I recognised my must-pick choice. Mad respect to Kim 'Kkoma' for picking an objectively horrible photo to represent him. Literally the first and third Google image results are worlds better (the second image is the one in this even) and I just cannot hold my hand up higher for someone with enough faith in themselves that they actively want people to see them at their worst to know that they are now at their best. Godspeed Kkoma, you beautiful man. Oh, and Best Esports event goes to 'The International 2021', because that is a comically awful name for an event you want to score any remote traction for and I find that unendingly hilarious.

So those were my totally serious and not at all dismissive picks for the best of their respective categories 2021 in the Games Awards. I'm pretty sure after some of last year's questionable decisions there's a miasma of suspicion floating around the respectability of this year's lineup, but we gamers need something of a live event to come together for and this is pretty much our last resort. So we're stuck with it, is what I'm saying. Ideally I'd have hoped this year would be a return to in-person crowds, but with the recent invasion from Futurama's Emperor Lrrr with the forces from Omicron Persei 8, I'm guessing that's an impossibility. Shame, I'd like to have heard an entire theatre of silence once Geoff Keighley's 'two years in the making' announcement drops. Unless that announcement is PERSONA 5 ROYAL FOR PC- No, I will NOT shut up about it already! We've been waiting for so damn long- let go of me- you can't silence all of us!- Justice for Joker! Justice for Joker! Just- The transmission cuts of there. Hmm...