Jojo All-Star Battle R

 R-r-r-r-r-r-r-raise?

Jojo's Bizarre Adventure is obviously a brand I've talked about quite a bit on this platform, for the obvious reason that I'm in love with the anime and I think it's a truly fantastic series with great designs, great humour, incredible music and intelligent action. It puts most of the biggest and best action related shows on Western TV to shame, with gusto. But I've gone several weeks without even mentioning the fact that a brand new Jojo had released! What's up with that? (Or to be more specific, a re-release of a old Jojo fighting game that has seen some improvements here and there.) Well that was because I really wanted to sit back and see how it was received by the competitive fighting community, of which I am not actually a part. I wanted to see how everyone reacted to the improvements made towards netcode and all the wiggly bits that casual fighting game players know nothing about to judge how well the team improved upon the original game, as well as to see the sort of traction this game would pick up now that Jojo is currently bigger than it ever has been. (Despite the very best efforts of Netflix to sink the series.) And I'm landed somewhere in the middle.

For one the game has no Rollback Netcode in it whatsoever, which as far as I understand it means that the game is subject to poor connectivity issues making the better connected side have an advantage over the other. Rollback Netcode, as far as I understand it, makes sure that the game will recognise when a connection isn't the strongest and rollback to a period of mutual stability so that one side is never wailing on the other with no possible retaliation. It's rather baseline standard in modern fighting games as connection shortages can happen even in most modern cities of today, 5G ain't as wide spread and adopted as everyone wants to believe. Not having that is a major blow to the accessibility of what is otherwise a really easy to pick up and play fighting game for everyone and whoever didn't want to put the effort in might just find their prospects of the game hampered by their own laziness.

And another incidental problem that I've noticed which should be absolutely unthinkable in any fighting game from any age, is that rage quitting robs the enemy of a win. That's right, you can rage quite out of any fight and it won't count as a win for the enemy. It won't be a loss either, but that's a supremely petty tool you're putting in the hands of losers that are absolutely going to abuse with that. It's galling to think no one at any point in development bought up that possibility, and even more so that this is a freakin' remaster where the possibility still was not addressed. That's... actually quite a shame. I say this as a raving fan of Jojo; the team really should have done better by this franchise in the raw fundamentals of what a fighting game needs to facilitate. This is not Gang-star...

But putting aside where the game falls short, how about we look at what it does well? Bringing the character rooster up to 50 with ten new characters, changing the 3d models to fit closer with the anime run and, curiously, recasting the voice talent of the game to match the actors from that anime. I say 'curiously' because this led to rewordings of all salient lines related to old cast members, such as the back and forths that Joseph used to do. And if you don't know why that is important: Joseph had a back and forth with every character in the game, meaning that this rerecording also effect Funny Valentine and characters from his part even though Part 7 is probably still years out from being made at this point. They also removed and replaced the Story Mode, with the only shame being that they didn't turn around and try to do an 'Eyes over Heaven' style unique story to replace it. That would have been dope. Maybe we'd have got to see what King Crimson Requiem would have been or something easy as fan service-y.

Jojo as a brand lends itself increadibly naturally to the concept of being a fighting game, both thematically and practically. Thematically this franchise is literally a string of boss fights one after the other; yes, in every Part except for the first one those fights are typically solved through intelligence rather than brawn, but if you translate the Jojo formula over to gaming then a fighting game or a beat-em up like 'Gio Gio's Bizarre Adventure' the game is really the only option available to you. (Yes, I am aware of the existence of two fan made Jojo RPG games, as wall as a TTRPG that was never localised outside of Japan. I'm choosing to ignore them for now.) As for practicality, the world of Stands is already divided by strength, speed and, most importantly, range. Jojo fans are primed to instinctively understand how characters use their Stands before they even play them, thanks to the developers sticking closely to the general rule of use for adapted Stands. Close range stands have in-your-face movesets, long range stands dominate from a distance; it's a match made in heaven. (No pun intended.)

And that gameplay has actually been heightened by this re-release which actually fixed some of the fundamental issues of how the original played because yes... there were some problems that impeded the gameplay. For one there was a stamina system which was created to try and balance some of the Stand Abilities but just ended up being a hassle to maintain. That was scrapped and thrown off into the bin where it belonged. And for two there were some air attacks that were missing for characters. Essentially what the team were trying to do was bring the gameplay up to scratch with contemporary fighters, and if only there was a concerted effort to make sure the back-end also lived up to that promise, we'd have a real contender on our hands!

Jojo has such huge potential in the world of gaming that I think just goes so underutilised. Personally I think that if a studio had the willingness to sit down and create a truly visually appealing 3D anime style of animation (which is definitely totally possible, just look at the Persona games) that could be used as the foundation of a video game retelling of the entire Jojo saga. It wouldn't be too crazy of a concept either; just a gamified retelling of the events of the manga with more action-tipped showdown scenes that end is contests of marshal brawn rather than wits. It would be a great opportunity to explore some more clever ways that under appreciated Stands could be used as well. Some of the idle ideas I've personally had for a Mista Versus Kraftwerk boss fight are just wild. And a huge Maelstrom version of the Dark Blue Moon fight with Jotaro? I'm telling you, a strung together collection of distinctly dynamic and interactive boss fights that get progressively more creative and challenging would fit this brand perfectly.

Eyes of Heaven is the next game I have my eyes on to be ported to the modern world, especially since that game has it's own narrative and version of Dio's Stand that I just need to see bought into glorious HD. (It's printed with Dio's name all over it's face; for no discernible reason!) I just really wish that these remasterers would spend a bit more time nailing the fundamentals for games like these, as there really is no reason why even a dated fighting game can't be bought up to modern standards. Fighting game mechanics don't age like other genres do, this could have been the revival to exemplify that as a sore part of the Jojo arc of fandom. Man, I'll never understand why these people don't listen to the sage advice of storied and studied Jojo historian and life-long fan, Mike Ehrmantraut: No half measures, Waltuh...

Is Dio Brando and Colonel Volgin the same person?

 "You don't even know what the Philosopher's legacy is, do you?"

Of the very few fleeting reasons there are left to endure reality, one of the most enduring is the love I have for Metal Gear Solid. I've not been subtle about that, pretty much every other week I'm sneaking in an reference or unwittingly letting slip some sort of idiom or speech pattern I've developed from that series. I'm an AI sponge, soaking up all the media around me and splattering it all over this blog without a care in the world. But, no matter how important MGS is to me, no matter how formative that series has been to my current place in life (which is significant, by the way. I got into writing because of Snake Eater) there has recently been another franchise I can't stop going on about. One that stretches even further back than MGS and is arguably more influential. And with the amount of times I've mentioned JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, I don't think there's much point being coy about that either. But what if there was more in common with this series than sharing fans? What if they also shared a main villain, between core Jojo (as-in, before 'Steel Ball Run') and my favourite MGS entry (III: Snake Eater)? Well that could either be one of the most hairbrained things my psychosis has ever imagined or... well, okay it's definitely that either way, but it could be true as well! (Oh, and Spoiler warning for Metal Gear 1-5 as well as Jojo Parts 1-5.)

Let me start with the Russian man first, we have Colonel Volgin: the Thunderbolt. This KGB career man started off his career as a humble war criminal from World War 2, brutalising and murdering captured soldiers in a manner that earned him the fear of his compatriots. (They grow up so fast!) After the war, Volgin learned about his father's part in an organisation known as The Philosophers, a group of wealthy and powerful war-time individuals who conspired to pool their resources in order to help end the war, (and maybe control parts of the world to ensure that another world war would never happen again, but that would be scribbled into their constitution much later.) Being obviously inspired by such a noble and altruistic philosophy, Volgin immediately stole all the legacy funds from this super group and used it to try and plan a coup against Khrushchev in a grand plan to ultimately escalate the cold war into a thermonuclear holocaust. (Like father like son?)

Now we shift gears to Dio Brando (prime), a poor British child born under the thumb of a drunk father in the slums of London, Dio learned quickly how to survive on the harsh streets and bide his time. The greatest power he ever earned was patience, and everything that would go wrong in his life from then on would mostly come in the times when he would lose it. Through the winding line of fate, Dio Brando's father would pass away when he was just a teenager and pull the last of his strings to get his son adopted by the wealthy Joestar family. Dio was disgusted by his disgrace of a father, but still seized the opportunity to become close to the Joestars so that he could overthrow the rightful heir of the Jostar line, Johnathon, and ultimately steal the fortune that he felt life deserved to give him in recompense for the hardships of his childhood. So not quite as bad as Volgin- oh, but then he rejected his humanity, became a vampire and slowly escalated his plans to turning all of England into his undead slaves. Only to then develop the power to control time in limited degrees and deciding that entitled him to become ruler over all of the weaklings in humanity. (Ahh... and they say Dio was an ambitious man.)

So now we start to draw the similarities, if there are indeed any to draw. First, both characters are blonde, which might not seem like much but considering that both these characters come from Japanese creators, a place where there is little natural blonde hair in the gene pool, it's a point that sticks out. Second, we have the ruler complex that is indicative of both these characters. Neither of them are portrayed to have redeeming characteristics about them but are instead varying degrees of avaricious, or tyrannical. Volgin wants world war, Dio wants money, then power, then total global domination. And both of them find ways to turn those grand ambitions into personal vendettas against the protagonist. Volgin finds out that Snake has infiltrated his base by incapacitating his lover, and from there on becomes increasingly obsessed with killing Snake and causing him as much pain as possible. "You'll pay for hurting Ivan!" Dio, on the otherhand, takes an instant and almost intrinsic disliking to Johnathon Joestar, not just as his rival to the fortune but because he represents someone born into all of opportunity and privilege that Dio seeks without having to endure an ounce of the hardship that he had to- marking the start of a rivalry.

And then there are the extremes that both go to in order to fuel their revenge. Volgin famously shouts "This isn't over yet" and lives up to that promise when he returns ten years later as a walking corpse of fire fuelled by nothing more than anger against Snake and maybe a tiny bit of Psychic energy. (Metal Gear is weird with its magic) Dio, on the otherhand, is driven by a literal curse of immortality (vampirism) that he harnesses specifically to drive at the punishing of the decedents of Johnathan as much as humanly (or inhumanly) possible. But there's also the aggressive sexuality of Dio, which doesn't seem as prominent in Volgin. Dio is ever the cult of personality leader, and many of the scenes of him luring followers under his sphere of influence containing symbolism of sexual attraction and the consummation of innocence, such as with the flashback with Kakyoin. What's more, we see several scenes of him with lounging with women draped at his feet and the many who's blood he seems to dine on. There's a scene of him trying to seduce a worryingly young girl in the later half of Phantom Blood and in Golden Wind we're told how rare it is for any woman to make it out of his harem alive. Volgin on the otherhand is proven to be bisexual, like Dio, but apart from a scene of being sexual inappropriate towards Eva one time, sexuality isn't really a big part of his character.

In fact, the many similarities are circumstantial at best with Volgin only faintly resembling Dio if you squint and try to make the pieces fit in the holes. But do you know what character they fit with much more naturally? That's right, the big bad of the whole MGS franchise; Liquid Snake. Liquid is a blonde, English clone created alongside Solid Snake using the DNA of the legendary soldier Naked Snake. (These seem like porn names, but I swear they're the originals.) Much like Dio, Liquid's journey starts with an adopted childhood insecurity which taints his lifelong obsessions, namely he believes that he was a clone made from Naked Snake's recessive genes whilst Solid was cloned from the dominant genes, making him the genetically inferior clone. (Which turns out to be the exact wrong way around) This feeds into a persecution complex where he believes he is geared to be the loser, just as Dio does thanks to the circumstance of being born to a poor abusive father, thus both characters are driven to overcompensate in their desire to reclaim their 'respect' and 'birthrights', leading them to a collision course with the protagonist.

When I started this blog I did so as a joke, seeing the stupidly vague connections between Volgin and Dio, but when I bought Liquid into the equation the similarities built and built to the point where now I'm not so sure. ("And besides: these aren't- my- characters!") The brother-like relationship between the hero and villain of these stories seems almost intentionally referential, although Snake doesn't seem as heartbroken about their inability to bond as siblings as Johnathon does. (But that's more down to who the respective heroes are as characters, Dio and Liquid are still shockingly similar) And then we get to how both of the characters have managed to persist in their journeys of vengeance. Dio defies all laws of physics and steals Johnathon Joestar's dead body by replacing Johnathon's head with his own, which then persists in a coffin for a hundred years thanks to his vampiric status. Liquid, on the otherhand, after being killed, literally possesses the body of Revolver Ocelot after Ocelot uses Liquid's arm to replace the one he had cut off by the Cyborg Ninja, Gray Fox. (I feel like I'm spouting out word salad, but I swear this is all part of the MGS plot!) That's a frighteningly similar means of revival, taking the body of another character in order to come back later into the plot, wouldn't you say?

The only spot of difference is, again, Dio's outstanding sexuality, although given that Hirohiko Araki seems more intune with sexuality in general, that might just be a writing preference. You've seen how open Liquid dresses, haven't you? I bet if Kojima were more open to that sort of story, we'd have seen Liquid seducing the Genome army just like Dio did. Right now I'm actually about 60% on the theory that Kojima at least took Dio Brando into account when designing Liquid Snake, and maybe even dived back into the influential insanity that is JoJo when further developing the character. And there's no shame in that; Metal Gear has an incredibly memorable main villain because of that. So there's my moronic joke blog turned into a genuine theory by the end, but what do you think? Am I onto something or am I just blowing smoke up my own end? Let me know-

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Stone Ocean

Let me have my fandom, 'kay?

Okay so I'm gonna level with you, I have absolutely no excuse for making this entry on a blog that is supposed to be about gaming. No tangential links, no segue ways, no clever weaved deeper inner meaning hiding between the lines and betraying a simply effortless critique and summation of the struggle between ballooning development costs and reduced development time across the industry. (Although there is a blog there somewhere) No, this here is deeply personal. Because you see, I'm a lonely fellow down here in the middle of nowhere, so when I want to go crazy about a topic I really like, there's not really any outlets for that. I can maintain a prolonged multifaceted conversation about the topic with myself, but after years of doing just that I've been informed by those that have walked in on me that this often comes off as 'creepy' or 'unhealthy'. (Philistines!) So this is a blog about an Anime that I can't get out of head because I'm so excited for it. No, I won't be making a habit out of this, this blog needs to about be something focused and the font of the games industry seeps endless, but I need a release. So here I am, releasing about that badass trailer for 'Jojo's Bizarre Adventure: Stone Ocean' that just dropped.

Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, you heard of it? I go on about it here often enough. It's a series that I only really got into recently (As in, hardly more than a year ago) and thus I'm very belayed in coming to terms with the various ways in which the franchise has influenced Japanese pop culture and touched many of the brands I would come to love without even realising it. Imagine my shock when in The Golden Wind Bruno led Giorno into his favourite café, only to introduce him to- Sephiroth? No, that's Abbacchio, but it's obvious who the designers over at Square Enix were sending up to when they showed off their grey-haired antagonist back in 1997, right in the middle of The Golden Wind's manga run. I would also come to find the odd vague reference in Pokemon, and perhaps less surprisingly, in Persona. (Although I will say I was totally thrown for a loop when out of nowhere, during the Yakuza 0 secret boss, Majima literally named the series with no provocation whatsoever.) With time and effort I've come to know the series, and have even started reading the manga at by own slow pace.

What I'm trying to convey is that I am along for the Jojo ride as it releases in David Productions adaptation of it; and all my knowledge of the franchise is centralised around that series. I've watched other related stuff like OVA of Stardust Crusaders, Thus Spoke Koshibe Rohan, (The animated and live action versions) and I've dipped my toes into further reading. But I don't go beyond where the Anime has reached upto, even though through pure merit of me being so invested with this series, I know a fair bit about Parts 6-8 without having dived into the stories themselves. In fact, I'm sad to say that I know both who the main Villain is of Stone Ocean and the name of their Stand, something which I hope isn't going to ruin some great reveal for me at the end of the series like The Boss was meant to be from Golden Wind. Incidentally, through arses on the Internet, I also know the single biggest spoiler it's possible to know about the events of Stone Ocean. And I'm sure those familiar both know exactly what I mean and can sympathise with my frustration over that fact. Regardless of having said all that; I'm still hyped as heck for the new series.

Jojo is so much fun to me, effortlessly dancing between humour and tragedy like some doom-bidden 17th Century playwright. Araki's sense of humor never fails to worm under my usually pretty stoic armour, and his creativity can make even the most mundane of encounters into some wildly overdramatic duel of the fates. Who remembers when Koshibe Rohan went up against a kid who's power was that he liked playing Janken? (Rock, Paper, Scissors) What started as a harmless kids game, which was endlessly annoying to Rohan, ballooned into a grand overly-dramatic standoff between wills and fate, as both dared the other to ever more dangerous... RPS moves. It was literally just an arc about a kids' game, but Araki's world, and David Production's animation, managed to elevate that concept and refine it into a brilliantly ludicrous episode that is unforgettable. (Then again, almost all of Diamond is Unbreakable is memorable to me, as it's currently my favourite Part) This is the magic I'm hoping for out of the newly unveiled Stone Ocean.

Set in Florida 2011, Part 6 of Jojo, coined Stone Ocean, is set to follow Jolyne Cujoh, the only female Jojo protagonist so far, as she struggles from within prison to prove her innocence and get back at whoever framed her. A simple enough set up, but I'm sure that when thrown into the world of Stands, Spirits and metaphysical discussions about the reaches of fate; this series is going to springboard into that ever-inciting crazy territory real quick. I, for one, am very interested in how Stone Free is going to play out in the series, as I've taken great care to ensure that I know literally nothing about it's abilities so that I might have that same moment of utter surprise I had when I saw Josuke and Giorno's Stands. To the eye of the uninformed layman, It looks like the Stand is actually made up of Jolyne herself, which is quite interesting, and it unravels from her body in order to materialise itself. (At least that's what I thought I saw from the trailer) I wonder how having a Stand literally connected to yourself, that needs to unwind rather than materialise, could make the user vulnerable, if that is something which will be explored at all.

I'm also very pumped to see this supporting cast, as people who are more familiar with the material than me seem to have some very strong opinions about some of these Jobros. (If 'JoBros' even applies this time around given the setting of a woman's penitentiary) I've heard such heavy-hearted opinions such as "utterly stupid" and "nonsensical" dropped here and there, so I just need to see what has people so worked up over this cast in particular. And, of course, I'm always happy to see our Ocean-man Jotaro Kujo actually showing up to see his daughter. The same daughter who would have been a small child by the events of 'Diamond Is Unbreakable', but Jotaro still went off to Japan for several months in order to look at Starfish. Yeah, I'm sure he looked up the whole 'inheritance' thing to justify the trip to the wife, but we all know he was there for the marine life. (What else could he have been busy with for half the series?)

But how could I even mention Stone Ocean without brining up the theme. That theme! The music which Yugo Kanno composes for the series, as well as the various opening themes which get made from other artists and Western ending themes which are picked by Araki, are nothing short of legendary. One theme in particular, Il Vento D'oro (otherwise known as Giorno's Theme) quite literally surpasses the anime itself in popularity. As such, hopefuls were hopping like maniacs in anticipation of Joylne's Theme, and I think that most of us expected having to wait until the premiere of the show. The gods smile on us, however, because for a brief snippet at the end of the trailer we actually got a chance to hear a cut-out of the song itself and the Jojo fans of the Internet went wild. I can't count the amount of reaction memes I've seen to the Jolyne theme after less than three days, people are stoked for it. (Either that or they're sick of the two years of Giorno's Theme being played everywhere, they need a new king to take the throne.)

One comparison which I've seen bought up a couple of times is that the Theme is similar to Wonder Woman's modern DCEU Theme in choice of instrument and a few of the chords. I see the resemblance, however I was never a fan of the WW theme and so I can't say I think it's a rip-off per-se. (I actually like this one, afterall) The theme actually surprised me in that it wasn't a retread of Stardust Crusaders (Jotaro's Theme) like a lot of people immediately assumed it would be, although in hindsight I can't imagine Yugo Kanno wanting to directly court accusations of him copying himself. (And I'm sure there'll be the old Jotaro riff thrown in there for prosperities' sake. Josuke got a snippet of that riff in his theme, afterall.) I do appreciate the leaning into Giorno's Theme's use of voices in the song, as it elevates the scene it's played in by making events feel bigger, like there's a chorus cheering on the hero at the most grand moments; and I just love hearing the name of the part be used. (There's no other opportunity in which we'll get to hear that.)

So this December comes with it's very own bounties for us in Jojo's Stone Ocean at it lands on Netflix, probably not over on this side of the world however, because Netflix hates everyone who doesn't own a VPN. (I know I need to get one, get off my back already!) Everything I've seen, heard or felt so far has been really exciting and I'm just happy to accept Jolyne into the Joestar Pantheon as it's been waiting patiently for so long. Also, I do know that those familiar with the entire franchise seem to almost ubiquitously agree that Part 7, Steel Ball Run, is the best that Jojo currently has to offer; and so a morbid part of me is waiting for Stone Ocean to be done and out of the way so I can start waiting on what many are hoping will be the Magnum Opus of this Anime run. But the rest of is me just as excited for Jolyne in the now, and wants to see her story firsthand. (Johnny, and his great franchise reboot, can wait) That's about the extent of my feelings, I thank you for sticking with my extended geek-out and hope you can appreciate how excited I am to experience what, in a way, is the finale to a nearly 10 year old series. (There will be more stories, but they won't be in the world and with the characters I've come to love) Okay, Weeb officially exorcised, now the gaming degenerate can reassume control.