Catching up with the Souls

 

You know, I actually wasn't all that invested in going out and playing 'Shadow of the Erdtree' at launch. I respect the heck out of Elden Ring, and consider it to be the most perfect form of the Dark Souls franchise- but I just didn't think I had the spare time to send it's way. And then I just kind of started playing Elden Ring again... which then made me realise that if I was going to access the DLC I'd have to get far enough in to beat Mogh, but I last stopped playing literally at 'The First Step' Bonfire on New Game +... so I just kind of grinded several hours and got to Mogh... and then I figured I might as well grind for some more hours to get to Radahn- as for some incomprehensible reason Miyazaki says we have to off him too! (I'm guessing the entrance to the underside realm is covered up before the Meteor shower.) And at that point I thought 'What am I doing- I might as well just get the DLC.'

But we have a few more days until the Shadow drops so what could I do to kill time in the interim? EVERYTHING ELSE! Everything I had put off doing in the Dark Souls franchise for so very long, would become my immediate goal there and then. That meant finally coming around to complete the DLCs for Dark Souls 3- in which are contained some of the franchise's most well regarded boss encounters, and I even finally bit the bullet on the Dark Souls Remaster after seeing that it would be cheaper to just splurge on the remaster than it would be to buy the DLC for the original. If that would even be possible- I don't think they sell XBOX 360 DLC anymore... Who knows, I don't- I'm getting to play the game at a resolution that doesn't make my eyes bleed and real honest-to-goodness frames! (I wonder if Gwyn's song actually plays and isn't slyly stuffed with miniscule micro-stutters like it does in the 360 version!)

Of course the biggest port of call was the Dark Souls 3 DLC- because anyone with even the most-passing sliver of interest in the community will know there's only two things that people never shut up about- Bloodborne being hard-stuck on the PS3, and Slave Knight Gael: the final boss of the latter DLC. Slave Knight Gael had amassed a genuinely mythical status under my perception of the Dark Souls franchise through sheer merit of his name becoming evoked in literally every single conversation about bosses under the FromSoft brand. "Oh, that boss was too hard for you? You'd never survive against Gael!" "Malenia was tough, but in a frustrating way- not the sheer perfect way that Gael was!" "Yeah, Soul of Cinder might have been the single most perfectly dignified personification of ever major theme that has run throughout the Souls franchise and thus soared as a final boss... But Gael is still the final boss in my eyes. Also did you know that Pontiff Sulyvahn was going to be the final boss?" (YES, EVERYONE KNOWS!) 

But does Gael live up to the hype? Well, I ain't answering that because I played Ashes of Ariandel first! A DLC which did the impossible and made the painted world not a nightmare to traverse. The idea of the other-universe known as 'the painted world' always fascinated me regarding how roughly it jars against the direction everything else seems to be heading. All the franchise emboldens the significance of impermanence and the dignity in death- whereas there is a world perfectly preserved in paint that houses creatures sequestered within. Then there's the little confusion about the naming convention. The Painting of Aramis from Dark Souls 1 is, it turns out, at least the base coat for the painting of Ariandel- as evidence by the fact that Pricilla's old tower is hidden away in the DLC. Both paintings are named after their creator's apparently, although Aramis is never seen residing in his painting, or at all- and Father Ariandel is a refugee in the painting, almost as though he himself is the subject. And then, of course, at the end of the DLC you are asked for your name so that the next painting can be named after you- despite the fact that totally spits in the face of the naming convention, although I guess that will come around in the Age of Dark so everyone will be a bit too preoccupied coming to terms with their totally rewritten reality to start penning angry letters to the painting-planning-council.

And the DLC itself? Fine. I've never liked how FromSoftware handles their snow sections- I think their swamps are always delightfully imbued with active mechanics that make them challenging but fun to conquer- whereas snow is consistently just a pain! Elden Ring's Consecrated Snowfields? Can't see a bloody thing! Dark Souls 2's Frigid Outskirts? Constantly spawning Unicorns- one of only two locations in the entire franchise to feature endless spawning mobs! And Ariandel is just stuffed silly with that most annoying breed of bad guy you can't help but hate! At the very least we get to see the themes of wider Dark Souls finally seep into the painted world as the concept of 'Rot' is introduced. A distorting organisim that consumes everything if the picture is not burned away and remade- presumably explaining the name change. Which of course births one of my favourite lines- voiced by a literally no-name NPC- "When the world rots we set it afire, for the sake of the next world. It's one of the few things we do right, unlike those fools on the outside!" (slightly related note: how does mister 'no-name wierdo' know about the goings-on outside of the reality he was born and spent his entire life within?)

But the real draw of these DLC are the bosses- and Sister Friede was an experience to say the least! Bare in mind that I was on New Game + 3 so already wasn't going to be having a fun time- Good lord did I not expect the mockery that woman made of me! Pulling my main girl Pricillia's invisibility move right off her corpse and doing it better- I'm ashamed to admit how many times I got manhandled by her until I figured out that gimmick. But even then the gimmick alone was just a prelude to the first three stage boss fight in the game- with three entire healthbars, mind you- not just three states of attack tactics! The fight was a thrill but so frustrating to figure out. Can't exactly call it a favourite of mine, I have to admit.

Which brings me to 'The Ringed City'. I'll cut to the chase- I liked the DLC. It reminded me more of the actual explorative adventures of Dark Souls 2's DLC rather than just 'an extended prelude to the boss' like Ashes of Ariandel felt like at times. But Slave Knight Gael is the big attraction. And after beating the man- I can understand the appeal. Gael is a supremely fun and fair fight that really doesn't hold any muck, no gimmicks, no hidden health bars out the ass- just an out-and-out slug fest against a worthy component. So many of Souls bosses from yore hold that one screw you move seemingly designed only to rack up player deaths rather than to add to the battle itself. Gael didn't feel like that, but he wasn't a push-over either. He's an example of the best of the series, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with the likes of The Soul of Cinder and Sword Saint Isshin. Which is probably why FromSoft made up for it by giving us Darkeater Midir. Screw Midir- screw his eyewatering high health bar- screw his one-shot laser attacks his farts out in his second act. I'm happy I gave on playing nice and chocked the bugger to death on his own overinflated healthbar. I know people say Pestilent Mist is not an easy kill like it once was at launch- but I'll just take the compliment if that's the case!

Dark Souls 3 really does feel like a whole different ball game with it's DLC- which I guess has always been the way that FromSoftware has handled their additional content. Chucking giant chunks of new difficulty ceilings at those kind enough to spend more money is really seeing what the community seems to be wanting and meeting them kindly, with a giant middle finger to the face and a loving clap around the cheeks. As a lifelong masochist who's dream is to torture enough self respect into himself that he one day grows confident enough to genuinely experience 'imposter syndrome': (What a luxury!) I love the carnage. Now I just need to actually finish the Dark Souls 1 DLC and I'll have officially experienced all of Dark Souls- putting the lid on a world I wasn't quiet ready to finish when I reached the final moments of Dark Souls 3- but which I actually feel ready for today. However it's pretty unlikely I'll beat all of Dark Souls Remastered before Shadow of the Erdtree releases- so don't expect a follow-up soon.