I fortunately know a lot of bullsh--, it's a talent that I always did posses!
I thought I was done with the day before. Nay, prayed that I was done with the thing! I thought- 'the game is done, it's shutdown, no one cares anymore!' Sure, I heard that the brothers behind the project were scaring up talent for their next, considerably more sensible, project- but that was next year's problem. Today the game is dead and buried. But there's a curious scratching behind the walls, can you hear it? I swear, no one else believes me but I know it there. Rustling and clawing like a hundred tiny clawed feet fighting over each other behind the plasterboard. But only to my ears. The cats, oh they believe me. They prance about the walls eager for prey, but the assailants? Invisible. Uncatchable. Incessant. And what be these cursed vermin that lay beyond my eyes? The rats in the wall that are Fntastic- throwing one last pathetic Hail Mary to exonerate themselves, the slimes!
In fact, would you be surprised to know that their latest statement has flown out of the woodworks to divert the blame for the utterly incomprehensible pathetic dumpster fire of irredeemable composted spew- on me? In a roundabout and all-inclusive way, at least. You see, 'content creators' are the architect's of Fntastic's demise in their extended Tweet through which they literally pull an Ursula on us. ("I know that in the past we've been a nasty, they weren't kidding when they called us, well, a hack!") And yes Fntastic, whom many are starting to suspect are actually the same company as Mytona, as supported by the fact that in an apparent 'gotcha' the publisher changed their name to 'Mytona Fntastic' to prove they weren't at odds with on another, do the ultimate boomer move of calling their dissenters 'bloggers'. This isn't the 2000's anymore, you can't call everyone online a 'blogger' and expect to be taken seriously. (Apart from me, I actually am the sole blogger.)
Their first point of this formally worded document hits strong. Fntastic claims they never deceived their players, never took player money through crowdfunding or kickstarters and even returned all the money forcibly even to those who didn't request refunds because that was the only way to completely avoid a slam dunk false advertising lawsuit- I mean, that's what a really trustworthy company does! In their words "What kind of company does that?" They struggle to exclaim whilst bent over forward with their member halfway down their own throats. Or to translate, 'yes, we've had the odd complaint, but on the while whole we've been a saint- to those poor unfortunate souls!' And as for their sneaky little brag about being a company since 2015 and operating honestly all that time? I'm sure those abandoned games they've left in their wake might disagree. >cough<Propnight would love an update>cough<.
I've already touched a little on their next point- about being such brilliant friends with their publisher that they literally share the same name now- (Might have oversold the part a little there, to be honest.) their next shot is across the bough of all the many employee leaks we've had over the years. By all regards Fntastic is an absolute trainwreck of a company to work with run by two semi-literate monkeys in clown make-up that trip over more feature creep than Chris Roberts experimenting with magic mushrooms during a screening of Dune- the brother duo lack any semblance of vision, directorial talent, management skills, and basic cognitive ability- according to these many reports. They may be less skilled than the Island Boys. In fact... they might actually be the Island Boys! Have we ever gotten confirmation they're not? >Google search< Upon review it seems they are not actually the Island Boys. But they could sure give them a run for their money!
Anyway, the defence to the many takedowns of their character is plain and simple. They straight up deny that those reports come from real employees. They make a bold claim that they weren't only on good terms with their team, they were actually saints. They paid extra non-working days, paid for vacations, helped with mortgage payments and kept such a 'Fnastatic' working environment (not sorry) that half those who left the company returned with open arms! Quite the distinction from the claims that the brothers fired anyone who made their one shared brain cell feel slow. 'You'll find that nowadays, We've mended all our ways. Repented, seen the light and switched the track!" And as someone who loves to hear different sides of a story and try to envision a world were both sides can be true at the same time- (Because 99% of all 'falsehoods' are never full fabricated, but carefully shared glimpses of a wider truth) it's quite difficult reconcile the pure bad image of the company with these apparent records of their caring conduct. So strong words, I must admit. (If not for their history of blatant false advertising, but we'll get there.)
But then, who are the real villains if not Fntastic? Isn't it obvious? The bloggers who "made huge money by creating false content with huge titles from the very beginning to gain views and followers." And, well, I hate to be the grammer nazi here- but if the content exists then it can't technically be 'false'. That's grammatically incorrect. And on a more substantive note, this claim is 'rather ironically' factually incorrect. The Day Before received huge aplomb upon it's release from everyone who wasn't me, because I had already seen enough zombie games for one lifetime and found the promise of a survival MMO utterly abhorrent. (Were it that we even received that!) And besides all of that it should be noted that personally, I didn't get paid a dime- I do this for free baby, oh yeah! But of course we didn't suckle at Fntastic's teat and therefore we become the bad guys, or to paraphrase: 'Now it's happened once or twice, Creators wouldn't pay our price, and we're afraid we had to rake 'em cross the coals!'
In fact, Fntastic insist that unbiased sources who have no financial incentive to lie like me- I mean, Dr Disrespect- actually liked the game and just said it needed a few patches! (Which is funny because that's not what I saw when I watched a bunch of clips of him stonefaced glaring at the boring gameplay of the dumpster fire in front of him. But I'm sure all those moments of praise were reserved in the moments that people didn't clip. I would check his Stream and see if he has any comment on this but... well... I'm not going to do that to myself.) In double fact, with some patches, the game received some positive reviews apparently! "Unfortunately, the hate campaign had inflicted significant damage." And they aren't kidding about that! Apparently the hate was so extreme it deleted the majority of those positive reviews and left only the sarcastic ones from what I can see- you know the kind that exposit variations of "The best part was getting the refund!" (And I can't seem to find any patches after the first one, which was released the same day the game came out. So I guess the hate deleted that too. Powerful thing, that hate.) I can only assume that those positive reviews were not made via Steam but rather telepathically espoused the developer's way rather than actually verbalised, and Fntastic must have silently patched the game to be really good for all those grateful fans, leaving no changelogs on even third party tracking software because: 'Gamers aren't all that impressed with conversation, true gamers will avoid it when they can. But they dote and swoon and fawn, on a dev who's all withdrawn, it's the team that holds their tongue who gains a fan!"
In their grand masturbatory delusions Fntastic recounts "people wrote to us that bloggers had deceived them and they liked the game, and they asked for access." And everybody clapped, I presume? First off, if they liked the game so much why did they need to ask for access? The game only went offline on January 22nd. Secondly, Bloggers? They used the term 'bloggers'? They would have said 'Youtubers' you utterly pathetic lying worms! We may have found the 1%- those who truly fabricate lies out of absolute nothing. There's no truth to any of this, is there? Bold faced liars and proud! Also "we heard that petitions were created to continue development" No there weren't. Google exists you numbskulls. "And on the black market, the game's price exceeded $200, and some even began to make their own mods!" Okay, second point first. The Day Before is not listed on Nexus Mods, the ModDB page has no mods and there isn't a single forum post or news story mentioning any mod apart from a rumoured 'play offline' mod that I can't corroborate. As for the first part of that? 'Black market'? These clowns don't even talk like developers for F- sake! It's the Grey Market! Steam keys are traded on the Grey Market! And I haven't bothered check if any 3rd party key sellers were charging that high for their fascinating artefact of trash they call a game- but why should I? They lied about literally everything else. They don't deserve the benefit of the doubt, they don't deserve a second chance, they don't even deserve a damn business licence at this point. These clowns deserve to be run out of the industry, and all industries, so they can go back to making a living stealing pennies out of the cups of blind homeless people or wherever these cretins came from.
And the kicker at the end of the rainbow? The final seal of crap to end this all off? Fntastic forget that they went bankrupt. Actually that was kind of a vibe running through the entire post, that they didn't seem to remember that they weren't supposed to actually exist anymore and even tweeting under the company tag was a bit bizarre. Let alone changing their publishers name to pretend they were close partners all this time. (And not just one and the same, which explains so much about why Mytona never dumped their poorly performing asses.) Fntastic sign off with a threat. "subscribe to our social networks-" (Oh my god, just say 'socials' you absolute relics!) "-to know what will happen next." Happen next? You're... still going to make games? On these accounts? So... all this gaslighting... that was your attempt to make these accounts seem credible in the future? Yikes, probably should have just started fresh, guys- this stink is going to stay with us. But if it really is attention they want, it's attention they'll surely get. Or to phrase it more appropriately. "If you want to see us wreck, my sweet, endure this rigmarole! Take a gulp and take a breath and keep addicted to our scroll! Dr', 'Tona, now we've get 'em boys- Your boss has lost control! Of this Poor Unfortunate Soul!"
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