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Friday 23 August 2019

Where is the map of the soul to open the future?

When all our trials seem to be over, despair always awaits us.

Oh, ya'll know I was gonna talk about this! Popular Korean heartthrob boy band BTS have just been announced as the starts of a brand new mobile game published by NetMarble, the company responsible for publishing the first BTS game called: BTS World (Bleagh). It's been a while since I've done one these off-the-cuff rant blogs, but this game just instantly caught my attention from the incredible subject matter; a freaking boy band, to the beautifully pretentious trailer dialogue: "Where is the map of the soul to open the future?" I honestly couldn't be more excited to learn more about a crappy Korean game unless it was going to star BLACKPINK. (Actually, if it was starring BLACKPINK I would definitely play it. Pixellated Lalisa? Take my money.)

First off let me just freak out about something: There was a first BTS game? How on god's green earth did I not know about this? With the tsunami of forgettable trash that floods the mobile world every day, somehow I managed to miss the release of BTS World. And that's not all, this Mobile game was apparently a freakin' VN! I cannot overstate to you, dear reader, how much I absolutely adore delving into awful VNs. My very life essence is sustained through the act of scrolling through poor grammar screens and vomit-inducing cliches. Oh, and the game features exclusively real world photos? Pinch me, I must be dreaming. (Expect my exhaustive review on that at some point.)

But back to the situation at hand. What we have is a big concept reveal trailer, half live action and half animation, that is positively seeped in cheese and melodrama. (Although I will commend them for the production value, but then that should probably be expected by the studio that managed BTS' music videos.) From what little we see of the game it is hard to get a grip of what we can expect, but the animation alone just screams DONTNOD's style to me. Life is Strange: BTS Edition, you heard it here first.

For those unfortunate enough not to have stumbled into the world of K-pop, let me introduce what BTS is, to you. The Bangtan Boys, also known as BTS, are a seven-member South Korean pop group from Seoul. They are inexplicably one of the largest music artists in the world despite relying solely on tired boy band gimmicks from the early 2000's, or perhaps because of it. Subject yourself to any one of their music videos and you'll be met with 60% sensually mugging for the camera and 40% surrealist nonsense that is at least pretty to look at. (I guess that BLACKPINK is hardly any better, so I don't really have any leg to stand on.) The explosion of K-pop groups that has occurred in recent years has partially been fueled by an attempt to capture this one group's success. (And partially because the Korean music industry is scared of losing it's right to legally enslave people.)

I would be lying if I told you that some morbid part of me doesn't love the rampant commercialism that these sorts of bands represent. Something about the kooky insanity of their presentation seems weirdly more wholesome than the majority of music acts that the western world has to offer. I say this whilst acknowledging that K-pop is run by some of the worst companies to ever touch the music industry (And that is some stiff competition!) I talking about the kind of people who work their talent to the absolute bone, to the point where there are some K-pop stars who faint, out of overexertion and dehydration, on stage. We're talking about an industry so abhorrent that they are actively working their talent to death.

I'm sure the Bulletproof Boy Scouts (Christ, they actually call themselves that?) have reached a point of success where they aren't worked as hard as their peers; but that doesn't mean that they aren't being exploited some other way. There are several rumors about big name Idols (The title that is used for this form of celebrity) being essentially prostituted out in order to secure business deals for their talent agencies. Much of it gets swept under the rug and hushed up before it can become a big news story. God knows how Big Bang's scandal made it to national news, but if there is any truth to the stories then that is only the tip of the iceberg. Really puts some of gaming's controversies into perspective, huh.

Cue "What is this a music blog?" You're right. There's a game that is coming out and I hijacked the announcement in order to delve into the seedy world of K-pop, my bad. For what it's worth, I'll put the game on my radar for the next few months, take a look at what comes from the hyper-creativity behind the BTS brand. This may (almost definitely) be just another desperate mobile cash grab preying off of the rampant BTS fandom; but if it comes from the same minds that envision their music videos then it will be one heck of a trip to go through.

This might not be enough to sell me on mobile games as a concept, but it is enough to get me looking. Their agency, Big Hit entertainment, seems to be taking this seriously enough to acquire a small time game developer called 'Superb', so they may actually be willing to deliver something of value. But given the lengths I hear that these companies go to in order to make money (Allegedly) I wouldn't but a mobile cash grab past them. (God, this is all over the place.) I'm going to stop typing now before I conjure up a lawsuit for myself, but if any high ranking K-pop executive is reading this, let me leave you with one request. BLACKPINK: the video game, make it happen.

PS. For what it's worth I haven't heard anything untoward about Big Hit's conduct, so I wouldn't accuse them of any wrong doing. And I'm not just saying that to avoid any future legal hassle, I've literally not heard a peep of dissent about them. They're probably one of the good ones, for the record.

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